Jun 14, 2013

13 Children From Hell (Some Literally)

Article By: Chiller

Children are a blessing. Except when they're demons or homicidal. Then they're not! But they make for some of the best film and television. Below find 13 of our favorite evil children and then take to Facebook or Twitter (use #Chiller13) and tell us if we missed anyone! 

1. Damien (The Omen)

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Some people think Justin Bieber is the antichrist, but this kid's the real deal. The prince of darkness. The son of Satan. In the first Omen (and its 2006 remake), five year old Damien doesn't really do much besides pissing off some monkeys at the zoo and causing his mom to fall off a balcony (arguably not intentionally, judge for yourself below). But by the time he's older, he causes his cousin to have an aneursym, kills thousands of babies AND goes one on one with Jesus (we're not kidding. See Omen III: The Final Conflict).




2. Isaac (Children of the Corn)

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In Stephen King's original novella, the 1984 film and the 2009 remake (an original Syfy production), Isaac is a boy preacher who blames a Nebraska town's drought and subsequent bad crop on the sinful adults. His powers of persuasion are so impressive, he convinces the kids to murder the grown-ups, voluntarily sacrifice themselves to a corn demon on their 19th birthday AND dress like they're Amish. John Martin played Isaac in the 1984 original and its 1999 sequel with creepy brilliance. Fun Fact: After going on to play Cousin Itt in the Addams Family movies, John became a high school english teacher and married his longtime partner.


3. Rhonda (The Bad Seed)

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This movie is noteworthy for a few reasons. First, a psychopathic child movie from 1956 was pretty groundbreaking, let alone one about a kid who looked like angelic Rhonda. Second, it theorizes her homicidal tendencies result from her maternal grandmother, a noted maniac. So we've got TWO female serial killers! Third, it introduced the idea that tap shoes can be used as a lethal weapon. Fourth, it proved losing a penmanship contests is motive enough to off someone. Fifth, we're sure it has inspired some really bizarre Swiss Miss slash fiction somewhere. Seriously, look at the resemblance.

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4. Gage (Pet Semetary)

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When 4 year old Gage (played by Miko Hughes, who directed "See" in the Chiller original anthology 5 Senses of Fear) is hit by a truck, his dad buries him in a nearby cemetary that resurrects the dead. Except this burial ground is cursed, and you come back psychotic and evil. This movie is TWISTED. Gage kills Fred Gwynne than eats his neck! He kills his mom! The only upside is his dad drugs him with morphine, causing him to do an awesome drunk fall against a wall (it's at 1:24):


5. Henry (The Good Son)

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Macauley Culkin moved past the adorable moppetness of Home Alone and My Girl with this 1993 movie. Culkin plays Henry, who drowned his baby brother, tried to kill his sister by throwing her on thin ice and pushed his mom off a cliff (spoiler alert: she lives). Henry also has the distinction of being the second youngest entry into the MTV Movie Awards as Best Villain, where he competed against the T-Rex form Jurassic Park.


6. Samara (The Ring)

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This 2002 mega-hit, itself a remake of a Japanese film, stars Naomi Watts as Rachel, who investigates a mysterious video tape that kills anyone seven days after watching. At the center of the murders is the silent Samara, who never met a hairbrush she liked. In addition to having "The Rachel" for goth girls, Samara kills by VHS (she crawls out of the TV and scares people to death). Which leads one to wonder, how would Samara handle the digital age? Netflix?


7. Toshio (The Grudge)

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Little dead Japanese boy with empty eyes that meows like a cat and preys upon Sarah Michelle Gellar, Ambyr Tamblyn and others? No thank you (and by that we mean, yes please). 



8. Malachai (Children of the Corn)

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Not surprisingly, this movie is littered with evil kids. Malachai is Isaac's right hand man, who does most of his dirty work with a nasty schythe and a gorgeous mane of ginger speckled hair that may or may not have been inspired by Stephanie Powers in Hart to Hart.

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While his penchant for murder and general eerieness make him evil, his name alone ranks him on the list. Seriously, MALACHAI?!


9. Lilith (Case 39)

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Renee Zellweger plays a case worker who takes in a ten year old girl after her parents try to roast her in the oven (!). As if that wasn't hint enough, Renee takes the girl in, only to figure out she's a demon that can control your mind. See what charity and kindness get you? Also, after watching this clip, are Renee Zellweger and Ellen Pompeo the same person?


10. The Midwich Children (Village of the Damned)

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Continuing the blond-Aryan-children-that-look-angelic-but-are-evil trend that the Bad Seed started, Village of the Damned tells the tale of Midwich, a small community where everyone in town simultaneously fall unconscious. When they awake, all the women of child-bearing age (even the virgins) are pregnant. The resulting spawn are emotionless, removed, analytical children with mind control powers who maim and kill anyone that hurts them. Most remember the 1960 original, but we have to give special props to the 1994 remake for featuring a chain smoking Kristie Alley as a government scientist, Luke Skywalker and also Crocodile Dundee's wife.

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11. Anthony (The Twilight Zone)

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Introduced in the classic Twilight Zone episode "It's a Good Life," Anthony is mutant and monster; his reality warping abilities force the adults around him into complete submission, for fear upsetting him will result in them being "wished into the cornfield" (a.k.a. being killed). Like any small child, Anthony can be set off by anything - a dog barking, being told no, forcing him to listen to Perry Como (seriously) - making his God-like powers more terrifying. This episode was remade as one of the segments in 1985's Twilight Zone: The Movie (remember, he's the one that took his sister's mouth away)?


12. Curtis, Debbie & Steven (Bloody Birthday)

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What's worse than one killer kid? Three of them. In this 1981 slasher, three children are born during a solar eclipse, which apparently turns people evil (note to the parents reading this - if you gave birth during one you may wanna lock up your meat cleavers). Curtis, Steven and Debbie enjoy all the normal youngster stuff - playing outside, hanging out, watching TV, scrapbooking (yes, really) and killing people. Their weapons of choice are baseball bats, skateboards and, memorably, a jump rope. Notable for being the film debut of Julie Brown (not Wubba Wubba Downtown, the other one). 


13. Regan (The Exorcist)

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As if she wouldn't be on this list. Poor 12 year old Regan is possessed by the demon Pazuzu and that's when the fun really begins: She gives Father Merrin a heart attack, punches her mom, curses like a sailor, throws a drunken director out the window, rotates her head 360 degrees, levitates, pees on the floor, maims herself with a crucifix AND pukes on a priest. This movie was so shocking when it came out people actually passed out in the theaters. Check it out



Many of you have spoken on who else should be on the list, so we have to give honorable mention to King Joffrey in Game of Thrones, the Grady Twins from the Shining (creepy...but are they evil? Discuss), the girl from Orphan (if you've seen the movie, you know why she's not on this list. Think about it) and Lindsay Lohan. 

Remember, you can always share your thoughts on Facebook or using #Friday13 on Twitter.

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